Influencing Tenet # 8 states: “We each have an insatiable appetite to be respected, appreciated, valued, and heard.”
With billions of people on the planet, we all need to know that we matter. We may grow up in size but we are still little kids inside. We are no different than my delicious niece LuLu. We just want people to notice us. (Here’s LuLu in her new ballerina outfit.)
And like all little kids, we look outside of ourselves for this recognition.
But the people we look to are also looking for recognition. As a result, we are all running around looking for recognition. That leaves a lot of people hungry for it.
As a moxie-leader you get it. On top of which you intentionally recognize people for their efforts and their contributions. But even the best of you gets caught up.
Want to take the pulse of your recognition efforts? Here are a few signs that people are hungry for recognition and sometimes even starving.
7 Signs that People Need Some Recognition
1. They talk incessantly
…and not about anyone else. They talk incessantly about themselves. They force an audience to pay attention to them.
2. The look like they just rolled out of bed
They don’t care because no one is noticing anyway.
3. They create drama
Notice how some people never get attention until some drama occurs. When they are drama-free, they are recognition-free. We have literally trained them to create drama in order to get our attention.
4. They grumble and gripe.
This is the “squeaky wheel gets oiled” mantra. We pay attention to the people who whine, gripe, grumble, and complain. Again we have trained them to do this to be recognized.
5. The reenact Lord of the Flies
They eat their friends just to get others to notice them. They will throw someone under the bus (proverbially speaking) if it will get you to notice them.
6. They go elsewhere
People leave when they aren’t getting recognition. The same dance happens in marriages as it does in the office.
7. They stop showing up
Sometimes they don’t leave when they want to. Instead they show up in body but not in mind or spirit or in moxie. They become walking zombies. These people have resigned that since you won’t be recognizing them, then you don’t get to benefit from their contributions.
Shame on them. Shame on us.
It takes courage to recognize the reality. It takes courage to listen. It takes courage not to get defensive or be righteous when we do. It takes courage to feed people the recognition that they need. That’s when moxie-leadership is born.
